Experience Change  with FREE TO BE
MENTAL HEALTH SERVICES, LLC

**As life starts to return to "normal" that doesn't mean very real concerns have suddenly disappeared (& have they really returned to anything remotely "normal").  We  realize that people are still very concerned about the health of their family, their job security, the stability of their financial future, and very importantly/recently their mental health.  The last couple of years have changed us in ways unimaginable and in ways yet unforeseen.  Now is the time to realistically evaluate what we do and do not have power over, what we can and cannot control, and start creating the kind of life WE want based in something real and tangible.  Living in fantasy isn't fulfilling or long-lasting, causing pain in the end.  We will walk through this together because that is what being human is about-the connections to each other that have been so painfully absent in recent times and have become so closed down.  Fear does not have to be the rule of the day any longer.  We can help.**  

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The Reality About Self-Care

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1. You will disappoint some people when you prioritize your self-care

2. Self-care often means doing what you don't feel like doing in the present moment to benefit future you (no, it's not all bubble baths, candles, and facials)

3. Your boundaries will scare some people away.  It's okay.  Let them go.

4. Don't neglect yourself taking care of someone else.  You don't owe anyone your time, a quick text back, or emotional support when you need to be giving it to yourself first

5. Neglecting yourself to take care of somebody else may seem like an act of love, but giving from a place of emptiness only leads to resentment towards the other person and eventually towards yourself.

6. Self-care requires letting go of relationships, habits, and choices that are familiar but no longer serve you.

7. It means being honest with yourself, especially when the truth is hard to admit.

8. Self-care is hardest to do when you need it the most.

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SOME OF MY FAVORITE MANTRAS (I didn't come up with these, just made note through the years of the ones I have appreciated):

• ​Expectations = Premeditated Resentments (especially of self)

• I don't have to FEEL Ok to BE Ok; "feeling" and "being" are two different things-one is based in reality and the other is based on perception

• The only way to find out how much courage you have is to go through something scary

• If things go wrong, don't go with them

• If I am facing in the right direction, I just have to keep walking

• Just for this day, just for this moment, just for this second; I can endure anything for a moment.  Emotional pain does not kill me--it just hurts which sucks

• Simple and easy are not the same thing; one requires more work

• Personal growth is a process, not an event; a lifetime of patterns cannot transform and evolve overnight

• We are only as sick as our secrets; secrets grow in the dark and die in the light of exposure

• Change is about progress, not perfection

• It's exactly as complicated as I make it

• The best way to get out of self-pity is to help someone else

• I can only keep what I have by giving it away

• To love myself, I can't hate the experiences that shaped me

• Focus on the step right in front of you not the entire staircase

• Growth, self-love, confidence, self-awareness, altruism, and positive change in self--these are all part of the journey, not the destination

• It all begins with me

• Keep it simple

• Do the next right thing

• The only way out is through